Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Tidak Menyangka

I do give thanks to God for whatever He's done in my life.

Really! He, who started the good things in our life, will not stopped until it has been fulfilled.
He really is a God that keep His promise to me.

huehehehe

I do really love You Lord!

You made all the people surrounds me, help me with all of their hearts and minds.

I have never ever think about that before.
It is a miracle that you made their hearts changed.
You are my everything Lord Jesus

Thank you Papa....


I love You, and will always do...


gbu,
ruth

Thursday, January 15, 2009

lagi pengen curhat *sungguh cmn curhat*

Aarrgghhh.....

sebel rasanya
napa sih yang aku perbuat ga bisa bener

aku lagi berpikir
dan berpikir

apa karena tidak ada yang bisa aku ajak ngobrol
bener-bener cuman sendirian
di rumah sendirian
di kantor sendirian

padahal aku dulu selalu dikelilingi dengan orang-orang
ato sebenarnya dari dulu aku emang udah suka menyendiri ya?

Yang jelas, saat ini
aku lagi ga bisa berpikir dengan jelas
pengen teriak pengen nangis

kalo bisa

hehehe

anyway, hari ini dimarahi lagi ama accountant - ku.

Katanya, bikin master untuk billing hosting nya ga jelas.
Pengen juga protes, "Gila, emang itu kerjaan ku ya?"
Itu kan masalah billing. Dulunya juga, katanya pokoknya print aja....
Sekarang, harus bikin master untuk mempermudah billing...
Tapi, ga ada orang laen juga yg ngerjai sih.

duhkah, jadi cape kadang2...
cuman, jadi belajar banyak juga sih....
*tolong doakan spy aku makin kuat dan berhikmat ye...haha*

Kalo kamu kerja sendiri, kamu bisa langsung tahu maksudmu cukup dengan memberi pertanda2 ato simbol2 kecil.
tapi ketika kerja ama orang lain, kamu harus bisa bikin flowing dan structure yg jelas, spy orang lain, bisa langsung tahu maksudmu. Kamu harus belajar nerangin ke mrk, spy ga salah paham pas ngobrol....

Dan...
buat aku, hal itu ribet.
Trus, aku juga ada kerjaan yang lain.
duhkah

jadi berasa cape banget

kerjaan dari ketemu klien, bikin minutes, bikin desain, mbenerin desain, mbenerin koding, bikin weekly report, bayar tagihan, kirim surat, fotokopi, bersih2 kantor, telp klien, email klien, ngasih perintah, lapor ke atasan, bertanggung jawab atas jalannya proyek2.......dari scratch, all the design elements, sampe cara marketing-in nya.

dan, parahnya, ga ada yang bisa aku tanyain pendapat.

apa aku mesti nyerah dengan keadaan ini. ato aku terus?

aku banyak belajar sih.
banyaaakk banget.

dari manage orang, manage diriku sendiri, disiplin, bikin minutes, bikin report, bikin jobscope lebih terstruktur, apalagi ya...banyak sih....

yang bisa ku lakukan sekarang, cuman berkata ama diriku sendiri
"ayo, semangat, kurang dikit lagi....hehe ^^*

yah....paling yg bisa kulakukan saat ini, menyemangati diriku sendiri
dan berlibur tanpa memikirkan apapun selama 10 hari.

hoho

i think that would be great.

nb: Pa, i trust You. I knew that you will make the Greatest Thing happen in my life.

luv,
ruth


a New Year a New Resolution, yet...a new chance

Heppi Niu Year 2009.

Too late huh?
It' s in the mid of the first month already. But, I have posted my merry elf-mas...So, you cannot blame me if I only happened to say it now. hahaha...

Anyway, it's not important.

Today, mm...actually not only today. Lately, I didn't even know when it start, but i feel miserable without knowing any reason. It is just feeling uneasy out of the blue.

Lord, I do really need you. I don't know what is this feeling inside my heart. I cannot think. I cannot imagine any probability that could happen. I just can surrender to you. ALL OUT.

I was in the middle of nowhere when one email landed into my inbox.

I read the email.
Sentence by sentence.
Word by word.
Alphabet by alphabet.

I try to think over it with my tiny little brain, yet I cannot fully understand.

Then, i come to one conclusion.

Being a LEADER is not easy.

It is not because you are appointed as a leader, then you will become a leader.
It needs more than that.

Being in the first place that there's no one guide you. Instead, you have to try your best to direct the people under you.To let the vision alive in the hearts of the members. It can be very frustrated, moreover if there's really no one beside you.

It seems that you have a power, but you don't really have that power. Someone still controlling you.
In a time like this, i do feel discouraged and trembled.
But what i can do is talking to my spirit, be strong and take courage.
Your God, will never ever let u down.
He controls the situation you are in, now, this moment.

Trust Him.

^^

Lord Jesus,
thank you for everything.
please, strengthened me.
I know that You are open the way for me.

ruth

oya...taon baru, ganti font baru..hahaha *ga penting*